As a resident in your putative Richmond constituency, do let me say how refreshing it is to see you getting involved in local issues on t5m.com …

Which brings me, as a voter who last time Xed red but is toying with next time voting blue, to ask you, as a candidate, a simple question.

Your leader David Cameron hit on the winning idea that MPs should take a pay cut and lose prestige perks to show voters, by example, that the Conservative political class aren’t just talking about austerity, but are actually prepared to put it into practice.

You claim to be a big-time green environmentalist. But people are wondering if you really mean it.

Perhaps you could follow Cameron and show an equal degree of openness and commitment by telling us what you propose to do about 4×4s — an environmental hazard quite prevalent in Richmond.

In non-rural areas (i.e. anyplace outside of Iona) these monstrous behemoths make HRH Prince Charles’ architectural carbuncles look like beauty spots.

Their fat carbon footprints hog resources.

Even when their drivers are not on the phone or texting (something 4×4 owners behind the wheel seem particularly prone to) the vehicles’ outsize obesity makes them especially dangerous to all road-users — especially small children and other pedestrians vulnerable to being scrunched by the 4×4’s unnecessarily vast metallic mass.

Finally, these gated-communities-on-wheels do send the wrong message at a time when David C is encouraging us all to pull together, don’t you think?

In the tradition of an older generation of your family, who correctly harboured a well-justified horror of euphemisms, perhaps you could please have a word with BoJo (or whatever Boris Johnson is calling himself this week), and suggest to him that these four-wheel environmental crimes are not “family cars”.

They are Pigmobiles.

If you want voters to support your 10:10 campaign, and to show political  leadership, why not drive these Jihad-baiting horrors off metropolitan roads for good? A zonal tax of £2,000 per day should sort the Shahtoosh from the goats, don’t you think?

Since all those production lines at the Range Rover factories may need time to be converted to left hand drive manufacture, we can be reasonable about this — OK, let’s start by taxing every non-rural 4×4 £200 per day per vehicle.

Simple question seeks simple answer. Please, no wriggle or spinny weasel-words — ZG, will you tax non-rural 4×4s off the road: YES or No?

Blue with anticipation

Rantsinya